The Language of Sex..

It was fall of 2010 and I booked myself to work in Budapest, Hungary, to shoot a series of sex scenes produced by an American company. I was at a point in my life where I was totally inspired by my desire to travel and explore, so in that moment, it was the perfect adventure mixed with the thrill of the unknown.

After months of reading about Budapest, learning the history and making notes of all the things I wanted to see when I got there, it was finally time to go. As I was on my way to the airport, my mind was racing with excitement, but there was one voice that I couldn’t silence. I had never shot a sex scene with anyone I hadn’t met. In the United States I had the opportunity to meet everyone I would work with. Whether it was on set when they were shooting with someone else, or out at an industry event, we all eventually met. This was a big one for me. Before the trip I got to see pictures of most of the girls I would be working with, and I knew a couple of the male performers I would be working with since they travel to the states to work from time to time. They were my saving grace in silencing the voice in my head.

When I arrived at the airport in Budapest, the director and his assistant were there waiting. Just like that, my adventure began. As we drove through the city I was in awe of everything I was seeing. The architecture, the way the bridges are lit, the design of the streets – everything was even more incredible than I could have imagined. The director was speaking to me nonstop in broken English while he and his assistant would speak to each other in Hungarian. I was more fascinated listening to them speaking to each other than listening to anything he was trying to say to me. Once we arrived and checked in at the hotel, I was given my schedule for the first week. The following day, I would be doing an all-girl group scene with four other girls.

The first day we pull into the gated lot where there is a large building with offices and a studio. They walked me to the makeup room, and my day began. The makeup artist was sweet and beautiful. As I was sitting in the makeup chair, the director came in to talk about the day and tell me a little bit about the girls. The girls I was going to be working with were from Romania, Prague, Vienna, and Hungary. As I heard about where they were coming from, I was curious how everyone communicates with so many different languages. I asked the director, “How many languages do you speak?” He said, “I know enough of what I need to know of every language to shoot what I need to shoot!” I laughed hysterically and couldn’t wait to hear him directing us all, one at a time, in each language.

As the girls arrived on set they came to greet me as I sat in the makeup chair. They were all so friendly and beautiful in their own way; their bodies were more natural than what I was used to. They were all so unique and exotic. So neat, clean and pretty, and all their nails were perfectly polished. They each had very few tattoos (if any), no piercings, no fake hair and no fake boobs. It was like I had gone back in time, and it was intoxicating. I was in a room filled with naturally beautiful women, all speaking to each other with their exotic accents, and my reality was, I was going to be having sex with them. All of them. My heart still races as I look back to tell this story. It was what I consider to be a magical moment in my life, also known as my “highlight reel.”

What happened next took everything to an unexpected new level. One of the girls pulled out a little speaker and started to set up her music. While we waited, the other girls were giggling in anticipation – even the makeup artist was animated. To my surprise, she turns on her music and blares Usher! Every girl in the room was singing Usher, in perfect English. There was no more language barrier, for that moment we were all the same, singing the same songs as if we had already known each other. By the time we were all ready to go on set, we had sung and danced together to JAY Z, Drake and more Usher. It was the kindest, most unusual, yet simple icebreaker. In an instant, they all made me feel so welcome and so at home. In that moment, I forgot I was even in another country.

Shooting those sex scenes in Budapest ended up being one of the most organically erotic experiences I have ever had in my life. There was so much passion and sexuality between us all. Every one of us wanted each other. There was a level of comfort formed by our simple connection, a kinship, something so pure it is unexplainable. There were no words needed to be spoken, the communication was clear, the language was sex.

This piece was published by The Stashed April 7, 2016